Posts Tagged ‘Caverna’

Everything Happens For A Reason

Saturday, September 9th, 2017

Well, the world is filled with terrible things lately, which certainly are more terrible than my own personal terrible things, which in turn have nonetheless been sufficient to keep me from posting for a while. I do have a newish boardgame review up for the highly streamlined Caverna Cave vs. Cave, and here’s a recent column you might enjoy in honor of the late Andy Rooney.

I’ve been doing a few freestyle rap performances at the monthly Downstreet Art festival in town, with my final one coming at the end of this month. Meanwhilst, here is a poem I performed at an open mic tonight, which seems relevant given the numerous hurricanes, fires, and other natural disasters currently underway:

“Everything Happens For A Reason”

That’s what they say
when tragedy strikes
When faced with horrors the likes
of which you’ve never seen
They will try to stay serene
and utter this atrocious treason:
“Everything happens for a reason.”

Pray tell then,
What reason requires the suffering of old men?
What reason requires dead bodies piled in stacks
from natural disasters and terrorist attacks?
What reason requires that a five-year old girl get cancer?
I’m pretty sure your answer
Involves something like “God has a plan”,

But, man,
In that case one of two things must be true:

1) You’ve got an omnipotent deity who
Only helps his flock, while other people feel his wrath.
Which, although biblically supported, makes him sound like a sociopath.

or 2) God had some sort of higher plan we cannot intuit
And giving cancer to a five-year-old girl was the easiest way to do it,
But an omnipotent god really ought to be able to do better.

Either way, please unsubscribe me from your newsletter,
Or at least, next time a tragedy chances to occur,
Please keep in mind that some of us prefer
To accept that some things happen with no reason provided,
Rather than be told, “This girl died because a malevolent deity decided.”

Worth a Shot

Saturday, May 31st, 2014

Hard for me to believe the improv show mentioned in the previous post was only two weeks ago. It seems like an eternity. Sadly, I haven’t gotten an eternity worth of work done on the boardgame book — although I do have a new review up for Hot Tin Roof — although I have gotten in a few epic boardgames including the World of Warcraft Boardgame and a 4p game of Caverna, the latter of which is probably the best new game of 2013.

But the improv show went well — far better, I’d say, than my stand-up at the other night’s comedy open mic. That, however, is largely my own fault, as I decided to be a little risky and do some jokes about the recent mass shooting*. They say that comedy is just tragedy plus time, but I’ve never been good at following recipes, and maybe I used a little too much tragedy and replaced the thyme with sage ideas, even if I wasn’t salty, the audience didn’t find all of it savory**.

Much more likely to get a positive reaction is my latest column, Praise Be to Cheesus, which includes the wisdom of Marcus Aurelius and a Buddha and a number of terrible puns. I’m very pleased with it, and the stromboli that we* made tonight. I have an insatiable appetite for good food and graphic novels. I’ve recently discovered that our local library has graphic novels, and so I have decided to read them. Like, every single one in the library.

*It’s important that blog posts have dates, because in America there’s always a recent mass shooting.

**Variety shows are the life of spice.

***This usage is what I like to call the “Third Person Royal We”, which means technically the part of we that doesn’t include me.