Well, technically of humid air, but then it rained a lot and the air got fresher*.

Anyway, this month has been interesting, but I’ve already forgotten most of it, because I’ve been pretty busy. Not quite busy enough — need to do more recording tomorrow for the exciting project I was hired for last month — but busy nonetheless.

The biggest event of the month for me was probably the WordXWord Festival in Pittsfield, a week-long event celebrating the spoken word where some of the country’s best performance poets came to perform, and it was totally awesome. But don’t take my word for it, take my 600 words in a parody of Poe’s Raven. Which will probably be taken down a few days after I post this, but oh well.

My most recent column, rather than being celebratory, is a lot more depressing. However, I think it’s also something important to note that I really wanted people to read, and of particular interest to anyone interested in humor in general or politics, which I believe covers almost all of my readership, so I encourage you to read (and share?) my musings on The Death of Satire.

That column came out two days ago, and already I’ve had numerous new examples sent to me since then. I think it really is a disturbing trend. Almost as much as people making abnormally short blogposts that end abruptly**.

*More fresher? Re-fresher? Freshluggner? Good thing I’m not a writer.

**But I guess the footnotes can go on for a bit. At least, I can. What my column doesn’t mention about the WordXWord Festival is that I found out another local poet was also a freestyle rapper, and neither of us had ever known the other rapped. So at the afterparty for the festival, one of the more-famous-than-us poets announced this fact, and invited us both to the stage to do some quick freestyle line trading starting on topics of the audience’s choosing. This ended up being a $10 bill and Battlestar Galactica, the latter of which launched our rhymes into a series of delightful nerdery, and it was the most fun I had all month, and basically I thought of all of this now because during that freestyle session the other fellow said that his rhymes needed large footnotes, and I replied that my footnotes were the tallest, because I was the rap world’s David Foster Wallace. Granted I’m not actually the rap world’s DFW, I’m probably more the rap world’s Calvin Trillan, but anyway, I was thinking about footnotes, and so that’s why I told you all this, and wow, this sentence has gone on way too long, and I’m surprised you’re still reading, but nobody stops in the middle of a sentence, so I guess if I kept using commas to create an infinite pest sort of run-on sentence, you’d be stuck reading it forever, which would suck for you,  sort of like a vacuum cleaner, which nature abhors, abhors love men with nice abs, okay I’m going to stop typing now.

What can I say, when it comes to bad pun titles for blogposts, I just have an itchy trig finger.

For me, freelancing often feels like a sine wave, as the projects tend to come in “boom” and “bust” cycles.* A few months ago was a nice boom, when I wrote the rough draft of my next book, and also did some work for Fodor’s Travel Guides travelling the Berkshires. Then I had a bust cycle, and I re-discovered that I am addicted to video games between Steam and a ceaseless torrent of indie bundles.

Now, it is boom time once again, with the page proofs for my book having literally just arrived a few minutes before I wrote this post. This means I basically get to re-read my book and fail to find typos because I am so familiar with the material that my mind will probably miss them. But the good news is, I am pleased to announce that before the end of the year, my next book It Happened In Rhode Island will be available for purchase. More information in coming months.

Meanwhile, the most exciting new development for me is that I have been hired on to help with an educational project. This is still in the early stages, so details will have to wait for later, but suffice to say I am finally able to both put my talents to use and have the result be educational in addition to entertaining, and to get paid for that is pretty much what I want to do with my life.**

Oh right, my life. Well, I am Still Not Dead, albeit no thanks to my parents’ pantry, and continue to enjoy each day. My partner, whose office you may recall was closed down a few months back, has decided to take up knitting as a career, and has been cranking out socks that look pretty awesome. Once these are in sufficient quantity to be for sale, I will let you know. I can tell you from personal experience last winter, these are much, much better than normal socks for making your feet happy.

Meanwhile, an increase in knitting*** means a decrease in boardgaming, both due to time constraints, and table covered in knitting stuff. We’ve still played a few games, like Vikings and Ascension, but with everything else taking up time and space I may have to — *gasp* — sell some of my board games. Not my favorite ones, of course, but just some of the others. I guess that’s a bit of a tangent.

*** If I were a knitter, I’d have some clever pun about increases and decreases here. For once, I’m sad not to be a knit-wit. Maybe a joke about clutching your purls? I don’t understand knitting.

Just back from performing stand-up at a Chocolate Festival. This marks the first time I can recall where there were so many kinds of chocolate to sample, I became full before I’d even tried half of them. I definitely hope to go back next year, especially since the stand-up went well too. Here’s a joke I didn’t think was good enough to tell: I used to have blackberry bushes in my backyard, but then I found out my soil was contaminated with lead. So I tore out the bushes because I couldn’t stop eating the berries anyway. In retrospect, I could have used them to make Pb+J.*

So, my set was funnier than that. Speaking of food firsts, June also marks my first time making nime chow at home, a delightful experience I hope to repeat often, because yum, nime chow. My most recent local restaurant review was of a new Austrian place, and while I found it only mediocre, I’m pleased with my headline for the review.

Speaking of headlines**, my column this week was about Headline News, basically headline jokes the kind you might hear on a talk show. And the week before that I explain that my endeavors in comedy stem largely from the fact that I am seeking approval.

Game-wise, a friend lent us Through The Ages, and we have been playing it obsessively. As in, sometimes 4-5 times a week, which is a lot for a 3-hour game. We haven’t played a game this much since Goa. At some future point, I’ll have to review it, but I’ve only played a single multi-player game so I’m still holding off. Meanwhile, it’s an incredibly compelling 2-player experience, and always leaves me thinking, “Next time I’m going to try…”, which I believe is often a sign of a great game.

* Making puns about “lead” is very difficult in writing, since the pronunciation as “led” screws up a lot of the possibilities.

*** Which is another joke I decided to cut from my stand-up this time around.

Or technically, Last Day In May Day!

It’s been an interesting month, with some good things, and various unfortunate events.* I did a lot of editing on the projects I was working on in April. The good news is that I can now add Fodor’s Travel Guides to the list of places for which I have written reviews, and I should have my next book about Rhode Island coming out before the end of the year.

Due to aforementioned unfortunate events, we’ve had very little gaming, although I expect that to change quite a bit in June. And the other bad news is that in spite of now having two fancy microphones thanks to the generosity of others, I can get neither of them to actually record without static on my computer. Which, now that I have finished my most recent editing commitments and have free time again, is becoming an issue. The answer may be that I just try to make some progress on doing things, and then record somewhere else if I have to.

Meanwhile, there’s still comedy. I am not only writing columns for posterity, but most recently wrote a column about what it’s like to write a joke. Which I’ve been thinking about because in addition to attending the occasional comedy open mic, I’m performing at the PAVE Chocolate Festival at the end of June, hosted by Rick Conety. It’s a family-friendly show, which means I can’t do any of my Rick Santorum jokes**. And while RBIT doesn’t seem to appear much in North County these days, we may have a few shows coming up at the Freightyard Pub on second Fridays. This, in combination with the first Thursday comedy open mic at Public, and the fourth Friday poetry slam at the Local, means it’s pretty easy to get out there and see me say ridiculous things, if that appeals to you.

*Life’s gifts have lately been lemony, and even a bit snicket.

**If your family isn’t politically homogenized, it’s possible that vulgarity and sex is more family-friendly than incisive political analysis. Which set of jokes is going to cause more tension in the car ride home?

Well, my nomination would be February. But as I explain in my most recent column, April is the Crewelist Month.

Still, this month has been somewhat cruel. My partner’s office closed down, resulting in dozens of people who lost their jobs, including her.* And I’ve been so busy with a freelance project that we’ve barely had any time to play board games at all — although I did attend PAX East in March, where I got to play Outpost (fun, although I still prefer Scepter of Zavandor), Innovation (still addictive), Quarriors (fun, but a bit too luck-based), and Legend of the Cipher (so fun, I’m joining the development team). And in April I got in a few rounds of Flash Duel, which I mean to review as soon as I can take some pictures of my first edition.

But I digress. I was talking about April showers of cruelty. They say it’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. But I will tell you that it’s much worse to have a false hope dangled in front of you and then pulled out from under your feet than not to have seen it at all.**

So, a few days ago I got an email from someone wanting to buy a banner ad on my blog. Two years ago I received a cold email from a random company wanting to buy a text ad, and said text ad is still atop my site (go click if you like online bingo, non-US readers!), and has brought me a few hundred dollars. So I figured a banner ad, though more intrusive, would bring more money which would be really handy roundabouts now. I suggested a price I thought was a touch high, and it was accepted without negotiation, to my surprised delight.

I looked at their instructions for putting up the banner ad, and it included instructions to install a WordPress plugin, which set off my Spidey-sense. So I Googled the name of the ad company and the word “scam”, and came across this blogpost, which confirmed that indeed this was spam/scam, and not the deus ex machinadvertisement I had initially hoped. And I mean, I know two weeks ago I wasn’t expecting that money at all, but it’s sure more cruel to have it appear and then disappear.

Speaking of cruelty, April is National Poetry Month, so I’m going to share one of the short poems I’ve been writing daily throughout April:

“Absolutely True Sonnet of the Afternoon Flash Game”

Thisafternoon I played an online game
Where players build a deck and PvP.
The first of our three rounds my foe did claim
And, poised to win the second, typed “GG”.

But then, I drew the cards to stay alive,
While his deck seemed to give him cards that suck.
And somehow, I had managed to survive,
He’d not, and said, “You had a lot of luck.”

Retorted I, “Your luck was in rare cards.”
Said he, “That wasn’t luck, I bought each rare.”
Said I, “Th’economy these days is hard,
If you can spend on flash games, your luck’s fair.”

Said he, “I’m well-employed, I must confess.”
Poor me, at least I’d had a lucky guess.

I ended up losing the third game. But at least I discovered a new alternative energy source, which is to hook a generator up to Shakespeare***, who is surely now turning in his grave.

*Her comment: “I’m just waiting for someone to ask me if I looked under the couch.” Yep, I’m still in love.

**It’s even worse than a horribly mixed metaphor where hope is suspended from the ceiling one minute and serving as a rug in the next. Hope: It’s a combination chandelier and carpet! It’s a floor wax! It’s a dessert topping!

All the stuff I was working on last post is now done. So that’s good. And now I have some inconvenient poetry for you. What does that mean? I’ll explain. Perhaps you’ve heard about the case at Cranston West, where a young student asked the school to take down a long-standing prayer banner, and a large kerfluffle ensued. Well, I wrote an epic limerick about this event, which was recently published in the Providence Journal. Unfortunately, Projo.com has recently removed their editorials from one-click access, so in order to read it you’ll need to go to the ProJo e-Edition, then go to the back issue for Sunday 2/12, and then jump to page B10.

If you like political poetry, I also wrote some sonnets about various pieces of legislation proposed in the past year. These are available in a single click at The Transcript, but will probably be taken down within a day or two, which is also inconvenient.*

Eventually I am going to do another boardgame review rap (which is a kind of poetry), but I have auctioned off the choice of next game, and the fellow who won chose some games I don’t have access to, so I am waiting for another friend who owns them to move back to town so playing said games will be convenient. In the meantime, I have put up a review of Homesteaders: Second Edition, which is a cool little auction game that avoids some common complaints/pitfalls of auction games.

And finally, it occurs to me that I have not written any new slam poetry in many months. Perhaps with my newfound free time, I should get around to finishing the poem I started a while ago. But I am no longer in the same mental space. How…inconvenient.

*If it’s any consolation, my more recent columns about Heroes and Valentine’s Day should be up for another week or two, respectively.

Seriously, you’re not.

My editor at the Transcript? He’s the boss of me, and I just finished a column for him so you can read my wisdom on things like The Secret of Happiness and The Republican Primaries.

My editor at the Eagle? She’s the boss of me, and today (well, technically yesterday) I finished an interview, which will be added to the restaurant review I have due this week.

My editor at Globe Pequot? She’s the boss of me, and it is for her that I have been working non-stop for the past few months, so I can get the draft of my next book in on deadline.

You? I didn’t promise you anything in exchange for money, so if some of my writing is going to be short-changed, guess where.

More here in February, I promise.

Dear Folk That Read This Blog,

Don’t skip down, lest your mind feel pain. Just read this news post. Okay, we’ve read that? Good. Let’s move down.

Well, this past time span ain’t been full with good. That item that Seth uses when link with webs, read mail, post upon this blog, pore over site then site, some with pics with cats, that item died. Well, more true, that hard disc died. Alas. Disc tray went bust long past, fans have gone bust more past, long tale less long, that item died. Done. Gone.

Here, Seth uses last such item from 2006, webs seem SLOW, plus chat won’t load. Lame. Also, Seth took some pics that were kept upon that item, game pics with plan that some time next week (okay, more like next year), Seth will post revs with them pics plus cool game info. Well, that plan will fail. Alas.

Seth must make more game revs. Some very cool game have been seen here this past time span, only Seth won’t post revs, Seth just wait. Seth must make game revs full with true fact. With some game, Seth have just done play with pair. Game have been cool with pair, true, only full revs want full true game play feel. That will mean play game with more folk than just this pair. Can’t post them game revs till then. (Come game with Seth!)

Okay. This week, we’ll have some cool revs with game that will just play with pair. Both this game ain’t from this year, ain’t from last year, only both game seem damn cool, thus Seth will post both link here. (Good news: Game revs link won’t just have post with four, will have full long word. Phew!)

Roma: This fast game does some cool work, uses dice plus many card. Folk roll dice, play dice onto card slot that fits pips, then uses that card. Dice also lets folk draw more card, plus draw coin. (Coin lets folk play more card into card slot.) Card will gain mark, kill foes, plus much more. Lose your last mark, lose game. Bank lose last mark, them with most mark wins.

Read full game revs with pics plus more long word upon game geek site: Roma!

Aton: This more deep game will also have more easy play rule. (Eery!) Folk draw card that will show solo, pair, trio, four. Folk play card onto slot that lets folk drop some disc onto some area, take some disc from some area, thus disc made gone. Play disc upon some spot will have more good than just lame area spot. Once four then four disc have been made gone, each area will give some good unto them that have more disc upon that area. More good spot will give more good.

Read full game revs with pics plus more long word upon game geek site: Aton!

Hope y’all have nice fest, then what tiny rest from 2011 ain’t gone. “Lest auld folk Seth knew fade from head then can’t come into mind, lest auld folk Seth knew fade from head, plus days with auld lang syne…”

Two things I love. And two things that, perhaps, some of my readers also love? I sure hope so.

In the Board Game arena, I have recently posted a review of Eminent Domain, which is a neat little game that combines mechanics from some of my favorite games like Race for the Galaxy, Dominion, and Glory to Rome. While not quite as addictive as its cousins, it’s still a very compelling game, and the fact that you have a lot more control over your hand and deck than the aforementioned games means that optimizing gamers will likely appreciate the possibilities.

In the Hip-Hop world, I believe I may have mentioned that Torrentz had released a (free!) new album called The Big Kahuna.* Here’s a pretty neat update: The Big Kahuna recently received an enthusiastically positive review in Wired. Granted, they gloss over my solo song “The Big Cheese”, but at least they mention my guest verse on “I Like Cookies”.

And if you take a venn diagram of the gaming circle and hip-hop circle, the entire chart (but especially the overlap) will appreciate** my latest crazy idea: A boardgame review done in the style of a freestyle rap:

Rappin\’ Reviews: Belfort

The freestyle was easy enough***, but it took forever to take pictures and put together the slideshow, so I’ll probably only do rap reviews occasionally and mostly stick with written reviews. Still, this was pretty fun to make. Also, Belfort is a pretty great game; as I mentioned in the review, everyone at my game night immediately appreciated the high-quality components and great theme, and continued appreciating the compelling mix between worker placement and area control.

Speaking of compelling mixes, I recently wrote a North Adams Mayoral Election Guide for my fair city, where I repeatedly mixed up the letters in each candidate’s name to reveal the truth about them through anagrams. Granted, this may be of less interest to those of you not in the Berkshires, but ANAGRAMS ARE FUN. That’s why I AM ARRANGE SNAFU.

*Which you should download. For free. There’s a link in the review.

**This is, perhaps, over-optimistic. Might appreciate? Will not immediately flee from?

***Notwithstanding the mispronounciations, the time I said “arves and dwelves”, and the few times I started to get off-topic.

Do you play “social games” like farmville or sims social or mobwars, etc.? If you’re playing Facebook games, or know someone who is, you really need to read my guide to efficient social gaming.

Naturally, a gamer like myself tends to look at everything as a game. For example: Life*. This week, we made delicious enchiladas and tortilla soup, and I got to see Weird Al in concert. And I performed at two improv shows. So I get a lot of points this week.

A few weeks ago I lost some points when About.com decided to let go all 72 of their Contributing Writers. I was one of those 72 writers, and had been writing about Board Games for them since early this year. So that was a bit disappointing. But I’m a gamer, so when I lose points, I look for solutions to gain more points. And thus I came to the decision that I should continue writing about boardgames**, since I enjoy reviewing games and feel that I am good at it.

Thus, in the coming months you will start seeing me post more about boardgame reviews right here on RisingPun.com. Or, at least linking to and discussing them here. I’ll be posting the full reviews on BGG, because that’s where most serious gamers are likely to look first for reviews. Today, I posted the very first review for the upcoming Puzzle Strike Upgrade Pack***. And I’ve got a few older reviews on there, for games like Power Grid: Factory Manager and World of Warcraft: the Boardgame. Those older reviews lacked photos, but going forward I’ll include photos in all my reviews.

I’ve also got a crazy idea for an experimental… well, maybe I won’t spoil it just yet. Suffice to say, my next post will have something bizarre that may or may not work.

* Yes, I know technically there is an old boardgame called “Life”. It is a terrible game with little volition where everyone has to follow the pre-determined path and pre-set milestones. People who treat real life like this oft end up miserable. One day I may write a book about this.

**Albeit, not About Boardgames.

***Short version: I didn’t realize Puzzle Strike needed an upgrade until I tried this, but now I wouldn’t want to play without it.