Various Happenstances of SethDecember 12, 2005Well, November is over. And if you didn't know that until you read the previous sentence, you're even more out of touch with reality than I am. Less than two weeks ago, I finished my novel. In less than two weeks, I'm flying out to DC to spend the holidays with my family, and then flying back for the annual New Year's festivities here. But between these two milestone dates? I feel like I'm just in limbo, hence the page title. This feeling is aided by the fact that I now have not one, but two tenuous projects in the works for which I do lots of hoping and then wait to see if anything comes to fruition. One is the usual*, but the other is a new plan to convince one of my oldest** friends to move out to my area. I enacted this with all of the subtlety you've come to expect from me, which consisted largely of enthusiastically explaining how I would gladly try to find jobs for both him and his wife, and could recommend a real estate agent. And I do expect they'll thrive out here and all, but I admitted to him that I wanted him to move here because it would give my life a +2 bonus, and my strategy is just based around increasing my own score. I suppose some people could call that low. But I've saved you the best for last. Over Thanksgiving, I had the distinct pleasure of going through my family's giant chest freezer. My mom tends to save food for a little too long***. My brother and I decided to take an evening and go through the contents of the freezer, which was surprisingly deep. We literally had to excavate and dig some containers out of ice that they had been encased in. We weren't sure if we would ever reach the bottom, but decided to go as low as we could, and managed to go through the entire freezer. We found some pretty old food. One container I found seemed to be labeled "Bat Mitzvah", which would make it well over a year old, as my little sister turned 13 last year. But my brother examined the container, turned to me, and said: "That doesn't say Bat, that says Bar!" Once I calculated how old that made it, we held a short Bar Mitzvah for the food itself, and then threw it away.
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*Same thing as every night, Pinky. Try and take over the world -- or in less grandoise terms, try to find someone to publish my next book. **And by oldest I mean length of time for which I have known him, not chronologically oldest. Though now I wonder who my oldest friend is? Probably one of the guys on Losernet. Though when I talk to older people, I like to say things like "Not so fast, my young friend." ***And "The Aristocrats" was a little vulgar. All work on these pages is copyright Seth Brown. If you are sharing it, please give attribution. If you want to reprint it, please contact me first. |